goobsohard:

The sexual tension between two people when one of them says “make me”

(via little-smiles-big-dreams)

superherotimelorddetective:

choc-o-late:

est-offensa-et-mirari:

deppsydoodle:

deppsydoodle:

why is peter pan always flying?

he neverlands

I love this joke because it never grows old

It has a nice hook.

This doesn’t make sense. I’m lost, boys

(via iamtaradactyl)

14th2:

aiclan:

afrogay:

if i die my funerals gonna be the biggest fucken party and you’re all invited 

if

great, the only party ive ever been invited to and he might not even die

(via weedgasmsandweirdness)

the-aspect-of-oblivion:

saturgay:

masturbate more like masturgreat ha u feel me 

no, no one feels you, that’s why you’re masturbating. 

(via embrace-lestrange)

epic-humor:

chinchillaghosts:

wivernryder:

chinchillaghosts:

heyfunnie:

why is bob short for robert

how does one get ‘billy’ out of ‘william’?

How in hell do you get “Dick” from “Richard”?

you ask him nicely

see more

(Source: goldenjoeandthesugginsgang, via mooimabananahead)

officialdogblog:

procrastinators are able to do 30 minutes of work in 8 hours and 8 hours of work in the 30 minutes before it’s due

(Source: circumcisions, via tlex77)

janetdevlinoffic:

Always remember that you are not worthless, organs are extremely expensive on the black market

(via ice-cream-pizza)